Chicken math. It’s a common term most of us chicken addicts use to justify our addiction. To even say that it falls into the “mathematics” category is a little ludicrous.
Let me give you a few examples:
#1: You go to the feed store for 4 chicks, but the minimum purchase is six. You buy 6. You later see a breed you like, but they are sold only as a trio. You buy all three. Technically, you have 9 chickens, even though you only intended to have five. When you apply chicken math, you have 5 chickens.
#2: You go to the feed store for chicken food… but it’s chick days. MUST LOOK AT THE CHICKS… but just look. You see that they have a breed on your wishlist and a few others that you’re interested in. You gotta meet that minimum though. You buy 6 more chicks. Chicken math impulse buys count as “zero” chickens.
#3: God forbid, something happens to one of your chicks/chickens. You are heartbroken. This is when chicken math gets really crazy… you buy the amount of chickens that make your heart smile again. Maybe it’s keeping the deceased hen’s last egg and incubating her offspring. Maybe it’s an order of 25 chicks from one of the big hatcheries. Either way, this counts as only 1 chicken.. because you are only replacing one.
Basically, chicken lovers are crazy and this math makes no sense. There’s no real rules- just whatever way you can justify your need for more chickens. My husband once asked, “When does chicken math end?”. I replied that it’s kinda like the repeating sign in a decimal point that goes on forever. I also told him that I’ll stop buying chickens when he stops buying hunting equipment. 😉 I think I’m safe for a while.
And if you’re wondering, my chicken math looks like this:
6+3+2+6= 7 chickens 😂
(My chicken math reductions: 6 impulse buys, 2 to meet a minimum, and 2 were “free” when I bought one lol)